Yes, the knee strikes back .. again! The big secret that I've been keeping for the last few weeks is that I've really been struggling with my left knee (notice the fewer training postings?!). A few weeks ago, I woke up and my knee was three times the size that it should have been but I couldn't remember any injury happening, which is always scary. Fast forward two weeks and the knee was still swollen. I've cut down my workouts drastically and have been focusing on swimming (since I still have a ways to go there!) but it has been really tough. I've been battling every emotion and thought possible over the last few weeks. I'm a very stubborn person and have been telling myself that I'm going to be fine, I've had dreams about telling my mom I can't do the race with her, I've cried, I've been cranky, I've been in denial, I've prayed for healing, etc. I've heard many, many differing opinions from people - some of which are reasonable, some are not. It's been tough to not know what's going on - I'm a planner, I need to have a plan in place and know what's going on!
Anyways, I finally had a doctors appointment yesterday to get it checked out. My plan was to go into the appointment and find out what was going on but the most important thing was to figure out if I could do this race. While the swelling has gone down significantly (thankfully), there's still a bit of fluid and definitely plenty of pain. Initial look from the doctor says torn meniscus but I have to schedule an MRI to get the final diagnosis. Not a great diagnosis since it could require surgery but I was given good news ... I can do the race next month! Doctor said that I probably couldn't do more damage if it's torn and if I could manage the pain and do it, he said okay! I did get a cortisone shot that would help with the swelling, although I'm not terribly optimistic since I haven't had much luck with it before. I was given the okay to wear a compression brace to keep the swelling down and take ib prufen for swelling and pain. I'm fairly confident that I'll make it through the swim portion just fine and I'll even be okay through the bike, based on my ride last night. I'm really worried about the pain I'm going to experience during the run since it's so high impact but I'm not going to let the fear of pain and excelling slow me down!!
And after two weeks of keeping it a secret, I told mom what was going on. I was really afraid to tell her too early because I didn't want her to worry or get nervous. I wanted her to be able to focus on her own training. I hated "lying" to her but I thought it was better to keep it to myself, which for those people that know our relationship, is not easy at all! While she's concerned, she knows and trusts that I'm aware of my own body and what I'm capable of doing. When I told her that she could run ahead of me during the race if I get gimpy, she told me that there's no way she would leave me behind ... that we were going to cross that finish line together. Yep, seriously had tears in my eyes to hear that. I'm really hoping that I can push through this and make my mom proud by crossing the finish line by her side (and under the DQ time!).
Dawn, dont make me cry, we are going to do this together even if we get DQ'd, its not like I havent been DQ'd before lol.
ReplyDeleteWe are doing this as a team, and after thinking more about all that is going on, I am so confident we will continue to train, and we will finish together even if our little guardian angel has to carry us to the finish line!